Monday, September 20, 2010

Falling Apart

Well Kya went to the vet today. I wanted her to have a check up because she has been having chronic diarrhea for the past month. The lady that we got her from had her on Albon and some probiotics with only minimal results. We were informed by the vet that chronic diarrhea in cats is the hardest thing to diagnose and treat. I find this a bit overwhelming and it breaks my heart for our little Kya. A fecal exam was done and was negative but he gave her a dewormer anyway because he was not able to get a whole lot for the fecal exam and he said that sometimes there can be bad stuff in the upper GI tract that doesn’t show up in the fecal. The vet also prescribed and anti diarrhea medication (Pro-Pectalin Gel), a prescription diet for sensitive stomachs (EN Purina). I pray this gives us some results.

One of our foster dogs, Shandy, is about to drive me crazy as well. She just won’t give Kya a minutes rest. We have been in the process of getting her adopted but it won’t happen overnight and it’s never a guarantee that the adoption won’t fall through at the last minute. It’s not as simple as moving her to another foster home either because the group is low on foster homes. We are unsure of the best way to handle the situation because this is the only dog in the house that can jump a baby gate so that doesn't help to keep Shandy contained. Shandy means no harm at all. She just wants to play but that doesn’t make Kya feel any better. Kya was around dogs her whole life, but Shandy is a little over bearing. There is an extra bedroom in our house that is vacant and we have turned it into Kya’s Room, but I don’t want her separated from me at all. Keeping the foster sequestered is hard because she barks incessantly and it stresses both Kya and me out. I am trying to find comfort in the fact that this situation is not going to last forever because Shandy will be adopted eventually, but I am impatient and want Kya to be able to get used to her new home.

This leads me into another issue. We have made the hard decision to quit fostering for a little while once these two fosters have been adopted or moved. This isn’t a permanent change and we will continue to do transport and other volunteer work, but our pack needs a break and I need a break. We tried to take a break earlier this year but the guilt got to me and I gave in and ended up with two fosters. I am hoping I can stick to the plan better this time.

My mental health feels like it is faltering. My stress level is through the roof, focus is non existent, and I am starting to not function well. I called in sick to work today and already called in for tomorrow too. I feel like I am starting to fall apart. I hate this. With my aunt’s help I am finally getting my house in order but I am starting to fall apart in every other way. That is always my problem. I can’t seem to get more than one thing in order at a time. These are the times I begin to hate myself.

Tiny Giraffe Kisses To Everyone!

1 comment:

  1. Remember how do we eat an elephant. One bite at a time. So just take care of one thing at a time. See what you have acomplished and be proud of it. You can do it......