I have had a bottle and a half of wine and I am not sure if I am ready to stop yet. I am also not really sure if I am ready to get better either. I have been looking into Dialectical Behavior Therapy and it seems so overwhelming and not at all in line with who I am. But isn’t that the problem? Who I am is sick, messed up, and not working. Ugh! I am so sick of being fucked up. Currently, I am too drunk to describe Dialectical Behavior Therapy, but suffice it to say it is the best therapy to help those with Borderline Personality Disorder, which is the disorder I am currently convinced that I have, and it is about practicing everything I suck at. Was that a run on sentence?
My hubby is overwhelmed. SHOCK! How has he lived with me this long and not become overwhelmed to the point of jumping off a cliff? Poor guy. He doesn’t deserve the tornado-like mess that I am. Truly, he deserves so much better. I drive my own self crazy, how have I not drove him crazy long before now. I don’t think that using “drove” was correct grammar. Haven’t I started too many sentences with “I”? Isn’t that boring and selfish?
I am currently trying to read The Buddha and the Borderline. So far I feel like and idiot and an imbecile, but I am going to keep reading it and trying. I have got to figure out a way to be less crazy and get better. There I go again, starting all of my sentences with “I”. If possible and appropriate I will try and blog about what I learn, but I make no promises.
For this moment I am enjoying the feeling of being drunk.
It occurred to me that I put in the title that I have the Best Aunt in the World, which is true, but in this drunken state I don’t think I can do her justice so I shall write more about that once I am sober.
Tiny Giraffe Kisses To Everyone!